{"id":621,"date":"2016-12-27T06:33:36","date_gmt":"2016-12-27T04:33:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/themptander.com\/?p=621"},"modified":"2016-12-27T06:33:36","modified_gmt":"2016-12-27T04:33:36","slug":"eftertanke","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/?p=621","title":{"rendered":"Eftertanke"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Idag har tanken slagit mig, en v\u00e4ldigt ov\u00e4ntad tanke.<br \/>\nAtt jag faktiskt kanske f\u00f6rtj\u00e4nar att bli behandlad b\u00e4ttre \u00e4n jag blir.<br \/>\nInte av alla, men av n\u00e5gra som jag \u00e4nd\u00e5 h\u00e5ller h\u00f6gt.<br \/>\nAtt utg\u00e5 fr\u00e5n en sak \u00e4r inte r\u00e4ttvist mot n\u00e5gon.<\/p>\n<p>Jag tycker jag f\u00f6rtj\u00e4nar \u00e4rlighet \u00e4ven om det \u00e4r jobbigt.<br \/>\nDet \u00e4r inte kul h\u00f6ra negativa saker men \u00e4r det sanningen f\u00f6redrar jag den alltid.<br \/>\nJag f\u00f6redrar att veta sanningen s\u00e5 jag kan utg\u00e5 fr\u00e5n den ist\u00e4llet f\u00f6r att leva i en l\u00f6gn.<\/p>\n<p>Att bara duga n\u00e4r n\u00e5gon beh\u00f6ver n\u00e5t eller vill ha n\u00e5t av mig.<br \/>\nDet har jag enormt sv\u00e5rt f\u00f6r. Jag f\u00f6rs\u00f6ker st\u00e4lla upp f\u00f6r mina v\u00e4nner.<br \/>\nJag v\u00e4rdes\u00e4tter lojalitet oerh\u00f6rt h\u00f6gt och f\u00f6rs\u00f6ker \u00e4ven leva efter det sj\u00e4lv s\u00e5 gott jag kan. Jag f\u00f6rs\u00f6ker behandla andra som jag vill att de ska behandla mig.<br \/>\nSt\u00e4lla upp och vara d\u00e4r f\u00f6r dem som beh\u00f6ver hj\u00e4lp eller st\u00f6d.<br \/>\nMen jag k\u00e4nner att jag misslyckas och jag gillar inte den k\u00e4nslan.<\/p>\n<p>Jag k\u00e4nner mig som en belastning\u00a0rent allm\u00e4nt just nu.<br \/>\nMen att f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka \u00e4ndra det eller f\u00f6rklara det verkar bara g\u00f6ra saker v\u00e4rre.<\/p>\n<p>F\u00f6rs\u00f6ker baka f\u00f6r att g\u00f6ra n\u00e5t som jag typ tror jag \u00e4r bra p\u00e5.<br \/>\nMen inte ens det r\u00e4cker l\u00e4ngre f\u00f6r \u00e4ven d\u00e4r saknas n\u00e5got.<br \/>\nAlldeles f\u00f6r mycket \u00e4r en jakt just nu. Jakt p\u00e5 v\u00e4ldigt mycket olika saker men sammantaget blir det inte bra. Att jaga n\u00e5got som borde komma inifr\u00e5n slutar inte bra.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Idag har tanken slagit mig, en v\u00e4ldigt ov\u00e4ntad tanke. Att jag faktiskt kanske f\u00f6rtj\u00e4nar att bli behandlad b\u00e4ttre \u00e4n jag blir. Inte av alla, men av n\u00e5gra som jag \u00e4nd\u00e5 h\u00e5ller h\u00f6gt. Att utg\u00e5 fr\u00e5n en sak \u00e4r inte r\u00e4ttvist &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/themptander.com\/?p=621\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[123,128,182,166,173,180,174,181,108,119],"class_list":["post-621","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blogg","tag-arlighet","tag-baka","tag-belastning","tag-egenvarde","tag-negativa","tag-ovantat","tag-positiva","tag-sanning","tag-tankar","tag-vanner"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/621","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=621"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/621\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":622,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/621\/revisions\/622"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=621"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=621"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/themptander.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=621"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}